Here is an excerpt that was sent to me today to cheer me up from my constantly thwarted attempt to reach things through the firewall .
“……A man in a hot air balloon, realizing he was lost, reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended further and shouted to the lady “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am”
The woman below replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You’re between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude..”
“You must be in IT,” said the balloonist.
“Actually I am,” replied the woman, “How did you know?”
“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct but I’ve no idea what to make of your information and the fact is I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help at all. If anything, you’ve delayed my trip.”
The woman below responded, “You must be in Management.”
“I am,” replied the balloonist, “How did you figure that out?”
“Well,” said the woman, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made promises, which you’ve no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now….. somehow, it’s my f***ing fault…”
Looking down for a moment she noticed a shadow of a third person standing on a hill not 100 yards from where the were swapping anecdotes.
“YOU OVER THERE ! ” shouted the balloonist trying hard to get the unknowns attention. Turning slowly the shadow morphed into a teacher complete with mortar board and cane.
” OVER WHERE ? ” was the retort. ” You only shout and holler when you need something and most of the time drink from my coffee cup without permission. You are belligerent, false and have very little idea of anything beyond what we prop you up to receive on stage “.
” What on earth can I help either of you with if, on one hand you control that which my learners access and on the other hands demand countless reports of what little we have done with it. ?”
The IT manager looked sheepish and the balloonist looked both angry and puzzled.
“What’s he talking about ? ” snorted the balloonist.
“I demand we conduct an immediate enquiry into what this person is saying…..” and with a burst of hot air dissapeared so far up ……into the ether that the IT manager and the Teacher we left to contemplate how to greet each other next.
As ‘Admin’ no doubt.